I have spent a part of tonight trying to figure out why I feel like I am sabatoging my own goals. I have been struggling to lose weight for some time now and I have realized that in my own way I am trying to make myself fail. I know what it takes to lose the weight slowly and safely, I know that it takes time and I know that I am doing this for me and nobody else. I realized that I am mostly focusing on all of the things that I can't have and maybe that is part of the detour/sabotage. Of course I have to eliminate some things for a while - they are part of the reason that I have gained weight over the years. I know that I can have the odd treat but why can't I just buckle down and do this? I want this badly and I feel like I am on the fence and afraid to pick a side. I know that my health can suffer if I don't do anything and I know that being in TOPS is helping me not to gain even more weight but I am wondering if I am afraid to really try and that I am focusing on the past attempts and "failures" from other dieting roads taken. I guess it all comes down to this: If I really want to lose the weight - I have to buckle down and really, really, really try. I hope I can still count on my good friends to help me and encourage me because you may have your work cut out for you! We will have to see how this goes.
On a "lighter" note, I plan to do some work on the wolf and to also relax as much as I can over the weekend and I hope everyone can enjoy the Family Day holiday in one way or another. I know I will enjoy the day as well.